Well after a hard week and weekend, and some prayers we have decided to try again later for Lucas. Last week I withdrew him from school. I contemplated whether I even wanted to blog about this, as in a lot of ways it is just something I want to forget... but if you still follow my blog in a year and I suddenly had first day of kindergarten pictures for Lucas again, you might get a little
In the "lovely" state of California, the entrance deadline is December 2nd--way later than pretty much every other state (Lucas birthday is in October). We were excited about this though when we moved here, as Lucas is extremely smart.; but he has always had issues sitting still and doing something if it isn't what he wants to do.. (okay he is stubborn and he got it from me!) He really was loving school; even told me it was his favorite place; but he was having a hard time following through with assignments and was starting to be defiant in the process. I was working with his teacher, who was great, and we had some extra plans in place for him; but then after an incident on the playground, Eric and I decided.. why fight this battle for a
After we pulled him, I started talking with people in the area and realized that just about everyone who's child (especially boys) had a fall birthday waited a year.... how we missed this before we signed him up I am not quite sure.
So it was hard, it was embarrassing at times, it made me feel like a failure... but really I truly am at peace with it now and feel like it is the best thing. I know I didn't fail. Lucas is my adorable, wonderful, energetic, always inquisitive child who is going to invent some crazy invention and make millions of dollars someday because he likes to do things his way. And besides now instead of being taller than 90% of the kids in his class, he will be taller then all of them--basketball here he comes!
Sometimes you have to wait for the sunsometimes you have to wait for the right time
Rich and I have been talking about this concerning Ryan...and even tho he has a year to go...we may consider doing the same. Sometimes it is best to try again later.
ReplyDeleteMy sister had the same dilemma with her son for this school year. She opted to "home school" for one more year to give him a little more growing up time.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter skipped because of a Fall birthday and will turn 6 right after the first day of Kindergarten. I think she could have been ready last year...every choice is individual and it all works out as it should. You did the right thing!
ReplyDeleteEm, Good For You! A lot of people would be too worried about "doing things right" to really consider what is best for their child, and remember, you know better than anyone what is best for him. I am sure that it will be good for him to wait, and come next year he'll be ready and willing. :) Don't worry about him, or you--you'll all be fine. I'm proud of you. :)
ReplyDeleteIt is so hard to always know what is the right thing to do for our kids, We had to make the same choice last year for my daughter who turned 5 in Nov. I am glad that you feel at peace with your decision. That is the best way to know what you are doing is the right choice. Enjoy another year with your little guy.
ReplyDeleteI had pulled my son out of K for a whole semester because he was too smart. I pulled him 1 month after school started, he had learned everthing in pre-school and would finish work then be disruptive. I put him back in K after January and we had troubles through 1st grade. He just started 4th grade is 9yrs old and they already want to put him in the 5th grade. I don't think he is emotionly ready for that. So don't feel sad about pulling him out of school. You do what's best for child, forget about what society and everyone else thinks.Oh yeah my son had behavioral problmes too, he went through 3 school in between k and 3rd grade till we found the right one to fit him.
ReplyDeletePlease so not feel like a failure. You did what was best for your child which is the very best thing a mother can do--no matter what anyone else says.
ReplyDeleteI would guess you will get nothing but support for your decision, from parents and teachers alike. You are not a failure and neither is Lucas. Doing what's right for your son is positive parenting and you will have a positive outcome.
ReplyDeleteI think that for boys--and you will hear this over and over, guaranteed!--being older is only an advantage. Social maturity is even more important than academic readiness, IMO.
I read a book once that said kids are going to school too early-especially boys. This guy feels that boys shouldn't really start school till 8.
ReplyDeleteIt's in "Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World" by Zig Ziglar. And with a name like that he's gotta be right about something, right?
Good for you putting Lucas' needs first! I am sure he will have a great kindergarten experience next year!
Oh hon...don't for a minute doubt yourself!!! This is soooooo normal!
ReplyDeleteTake this lovingly offered from a Mom of five and preschool teacher to 100's over the years. YOU know your child better than anyone else!! It is very normal for especially boys to take longer to get the whole sit still and conform thing down. It's normal!! Fox who is now a champ in school and is way ahead ..needed this too. We homeschooled him through first grade. By then he was ready to fly. Before that - despite the huge brain...he would have driven his teacher crazy..no sitting power - lol!! Your kiddo will do fine. The fact that you did what you did makes me think you are a very wonderful parent and by no stretch of the imagination a failure!!! Hugs Mom and Teacher hugs, Sarah
Being from the "lovely" state of CA myself, I started kindergarten when I was four and didn't have any problems. But I've always heard that it's so different with boys. People are already telling us that when our boy is ready for school we should wait a year. You really have to do what is best for each child individually, which is what you have done for Lucas. He'll do great next year!
ReplyDeleteYou're nothing but successful in my book. I love you all to pieces! I think he'll do great next year.
ReplyDeleteYou gotta do what's right for your family, and it sounds like you did. Good job, mama.
ReplyDeleteI think knowing your kid is the ULTIMATE in being a Mom. (and Dad) And you two obviously know him and so for that you made the right choice by him. NOTHING to be embarrassed about. Nothing at all.
ReplyDeleteAwesome picture too!!!
I have a niece who barely makes the deadline and her parents chose to put her through. She is in first grade now. While she is smart enough to be in first grade, she has no struggles with her school work, emotionally I don't think she is really ready to be there and they are still having to deal with that. EVERYDAY.
ReplyDeleteI think you probably made just the right decision for all of you.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I'm sure it will benefit a lot of moms out there going through the same thing.
ReplyDeleteSome famous quotes:
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent in doing nothing.
We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success. We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery.
***Welcome to SITS!*****
Very good to do what is right for your son. I'm sorry for the difficulties you faced afterward.
ReplyDeleteWow, that is a really late deadline! It's August 1st here. I'm already stressed about next year and my middle son. Even though he makes the cut-off, having a May birthday, it still makes him one of the younger ones in the class.
ReplyDelete